Until I received release from the captivity that held me as "Queen Know It All," I struggled to understand some of my unattractive behaviors and why they continued to plagued me without any enduring victory over them.
Since repenting of the idolatry over my pride that encased and fortified the lie I once believed, I have been receptive to receive more correction from God. I can truly say, I am comforted by the discipline of the Lord.
During corporate prayer, He opened the eyes of my heart to see how I have been given a passion to know and understand all things pertaining to love and relationships since my earliest days. My pride perverted that passion, turning me into Queen Know It All. Therefore, I am having another cavernous vein that an idol once occupied, washed by the word of my gracious Father in Heaven, replaced with the truth and filled with His Holy Spirit.
It all started when God awakened me that night at 3AM to pray. Even though I spent the next 2 hours randomly praying, I wasn't sure what it was I was to be praying about and it felt as if I accomplished a total of 20 minutes of actual praying. I should have opened my bible that was right within my reach because I had the light turned on already anyway, but the enemy managed to keep me from doing so. Instead, I spent a lot of the time pondering what I have been learning from the bible recently along with a couple verses I've meditated on for years. Looking back, though I felt my time was unproductive or inefficient, I saw the benefit of it in early morning prayer when He broke my heart once again for my sin of pride.
Job was considered blameless. He was not considered sinless. He offered sacrifices for his sin and the sin of all his family in case any of them had sinned the evening before. I am learning to keep short accounts. I may not be aware of my sin or the separation from God that it caused but He is, and He is able to give us a spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and strength, the spirit of knowledge and the fear of the LORD. May He cause the Spirit of the LORD to rest upon us. Isaiah 11
"Jesus, let's see now, what can my new title be?"
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